5 Rituals For a Successful Marriage

Learn the tricks.

By Anonymous

There is definitely an art and a science to successful marriage. In order for your marriage to thrive, it’s important to create daily rituals of spending time together, showing fondness and esteem to your partner, and learning to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. Shared meaning and friendship are the glue that can hold a marriage together.

The key to a successful marriage is to reflect daily upon the importance of how you spend your time and developing rituals that promote better communication and atonement with your partner.

Creating daily and weekly rituals with your partner will help you to learn more about his or her passions and dreams. Author Nathaniel Branden explains that if you find time to admire your partner, not just for how he or she acts with you, but for how they operate in all spheres of their life, it will strengthen your love when it is being tested by adversity and conflicts. In The Psychology of Romantic Love Branden suggests that admiration is the most powerful foundation for a relationship.

6 Rituals for a Successful Marriage:

1. Eat meals together daily.

It may not be possible to do this each day but if you strive to eat five meals a week together, you’ll probably find you’re sitting down at the table together most nights. Turn off the TV and cell phones (no texting) and tune into your partner.

2. Set aside at least 30 minutes each day to sharpen your communication skills. 

In The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, author Stephen R. Covey advises us to seek first to understand: then to be understood. Open up the lines of communication with your partner by tuning in to what he or she is saying and validating him or her—even if you don’t agree. This should not be a complaint session but rather an opportunity to discuss things going on between you and to express your thoughts, feelings, and wishes.

3. Adopt a time weekly time to discuss a positive vision for your relationship. 

This will help you feel connected and develop a clear picture of where you are heading. Discuss your values and thoughts about a range of topics such as mundane matters (purchases) as well as heavier topics such as in-law issues and raising your children and/or stepchildren. Start with setting three goals that are meaningful to you. Keep in mind that it can take up to a month to see any change.

4. Find time for physical exercise and excitement each day.

Try to power walk around the neighborhood or go to the Gym together. Add a little novelty and excitement by going to dance classes. Studies show that sharing an exciting experience can bring couples closer together.

5. Hug it out and find ways to show physical affection.

It has been proven that hugging your partner for even thirty seconds a day actually increases your intimacy and passion. According to author Dr. Kory Floyd, physical contact releases feel good hormones. Holding hands, hugging, touching, and making out can release oxytocin (the bonding hormone) that reduces pain and causes a calming sensation. Studies show that it’s released during sexual orgasm as well. Physical affection also reduces stress hormones — lowering daily levels of the stress hormone cortisol.

Never underestimate the power of having a great time with your partner. Doing silly things like singing in the shower together or body surfing at the beach can bring joy and laughter. Telling jokes, watching funny movies, or anything else that brings you both pleasure can ignite passion and keep you connected.

Creating daily or weekly rituals will enable you to spend quality time together. Carve out time to be with your partner so you don’t become “two ships passing in the night.” Focus on spending time doing enjoyable activities that bring you both pleasure. 

Cheers!